Last updated 3 months ago. Our resources are updated regularly but please keep in mind that links, programs, policies, and contact information do change.
Military families face challenges most civilians never encounter. Spouses endure unemployment rates four times the national average. Children change schools up to eight times before graduating high school. Families separate for months at a time, relocate every two to three years, and navigate financial pressures that would break many civilian households.
The statistics paint a sobering picture. Eighty-one percent of military spouses have been separated from their service member due to military obligations within the last 18 months. One in four enlisted families struggles with food insecurity. Military spouse unemployment has hovered around 21% for decades—a crisis that costs the military billions in lost talent and family instability.
Yet the Department of Defense has built one of the world’s most comprehensive support networks in response to these challenges. From 24/7 crisis hotlines to specialized programs for children with disabilities, from financial counseling to spouse career coaching, the military has developed a web of resources designed to help families not just survive but thrive under extraordinary circumstances.
The challenge isn’t the availability of support—it’s knowing what exists and how to access it. This guide cuts through the bureaucracy and acronyms to provide military families with a roadmap to the help they need, when they need it.
Understanding Military Resilience
Modern military resilience goes far beyond the old “tough it out” mentality. The Department of Defense now defines resilience as the ability to withstand, adapt, recover, and grow when confronted with military life’s unique stressors. This represents a fundamental shift from reactive crisis response to proactive strength building.
The military’s approach centers on five interconnected pillars that form the foundation of family readiness.
Mental Fitness
Mental fitness involves effectively coping with stressors, approaching challenges with positive mindsets, and demonstrating self-control in choices and actions. Key skills include mindfulness, emotional regulation, reframing negative thoughts, and understanding when and how to seek help.
This pillar recognizes that mental strength isn’t about suppressing emotions or avoiding difficult situations. Instead, it teaches practical skills for managing stress, building emotional intelligence, and maintaining psychological balance under pressure.
Physical Fitness
Physical fitness focuses on adopting healthy behaviors like regular exercise, sound nutrition, and effective sleep hygiene. The military operates on the principle that “strong bodies help build strong minds”—recognizing the direct connection between physical and mental health.
This dimension goes beyond passing fitness tests. It encompasses understanding how physical health impacts mood, energy levels, decision-making ability, and overall resilience. Families learn how proper nutrition, adequate sleep, and regular exercise create the foundation for handling life’s challenges.
Social Fitness
Social fitness emphasizes building and valuing strong interpersonal relationships and social networks. The military recognizes that robust connections with family, peers, and community serve as critical protective factors during times of adversity.
Military life can be isolating. Frequent moves disrupt social networks, deployments strain relationships, and the unique nature of military service can create barriers to forming civilian friendships. Social fitness programs help families build and maintain meaningful connections despite these challenges.
Spiritual Fitness
Spiritual fitness involves drawing upon beliefs, principles, or values that provide purpose, meaning, and perseverance. This pillar is intentionally broad, encompassing not just religious faith but also worldviews, ethics, morals, and connection to something larger than oneself.
Whether through organized religion, personal philosophy, or commitment to service, spiritual fitness helps individuals find meaning in sacrifice and maintain hope during difficult times. It provides the “why” that sustains families through military life’s demands.
Family Fitness
Family fitness focuses on strengthening the family unit itself through healthy relationships, improved communication, and effective problem-solving skills. This dimension recognizes that in military life, families succeed or fail together.
Programs under this pillar help couples maintain strong marriages despite separation and stress, teach children coping skills for military life’s unique challenges, and provide parents with tools for raising resilient kids in constantly changing environments.
The Reality of Military Family Life
The extensive network of resilience programs exists because military families face documented, severe, and interconnected stressors that civilian families rarely encounter.
Constant Separation and Relocation
Military families live in a state of perpetual transition. Eighty-one percent of military spouses have been separated from their service member due to military obligations within the last 18 months. Nearly 40% have endured multiple separations lasting longer than a month.
These separations occur alongside frequent relocations. Military families move every two to three years on average. Military children change schools up to eight times before high school graduation—a level of instability that would be considered traumatic in civilian contexts.
Permanent Change of Station moves create cascading financial stress. Many families report it takes a year or more to recover financially from a single PCS move, even with military allowances designed to offset costs.
The Spouse Employment Crisis
Military spouse unemployment represents one of the military’s most persistent challenges. In 2021, 21% of military spouses were unemployed—nearly four times the national average. This figure has remained stubbornly high for decades despite numerous intervention attempts.
For those who find work, underemployment is widespread. Sixty-six percent report being overqualified for their jobs or underpaid relative to their education and experience. Frequent moves, licensing challenges, and lack of portable careers create barriers that civilian spouses rarely face.
The financial impact is severe. Seventy-seven percent of active-duty families now say two incomes are vital to their financial well-being—a dramatic increase from 63% in 2019. This makes spouse unemployment not just a career issue but a family financial crisis.
Housing and Financial Pressures
Basic Allowance for Housing has failed to keep pace with rising costs. The proportion of families reporting their BAH covers housing costs has plummeted from 42% in 2020 to just 26% in 2024.
These financial strains contribute to widespread food insecurity. One in six active-duty families struggles with food security, rising to one in four among enlisted families. In a volunteer military dependent on retention, these statistics represent both human tragedy and national security concerns.
Child Care and Mental Health Impacts
The lack of accessible, affordable child care creates barriers to both spouse employment and family stability. Less than a quarter of spouses who need child care report consistently finding it. High turnover rates among DoD child care staff—ranging from 34% to 50%—lead to long waitlists at on-base facilities.
The cumulative stress shows up in mental health statistics. Military spouses report Generalized Anxiety Disorder diagnoses at rates of 25%—significantly higher than civilian populations. Military children face increasing mental health concerns, while families encounter severe barriers to accessing care.
These stressors create a cascade effect directly impacting national defense capabilities. A required PCS move forces a spouse to quit their job, contributing to high unemployment rates. Loss of second income, combined with unreimbursed moving costs and inadequate housing allowances, creates intense financial pressure.
The inability to find child care prevents workforce reentry, locking families into precarious financial states. This cycle drives spouse dissatisfaction, which is a primary factor in service members’ decisions to leave the military. Programs addressing spouse employment, financial counseling, and child care aren’t just family benefits—they’re fundamental investments in force retention and mission readiness.
Your First Stop: Military OneSource
Navigating the vast ecosystem of military support can overwhelm anyone, especially during stressful times. The Department of Defense created Military OneSource as the central “no wrong door” hub for the entire military community.
What Military OneSource Provides
Military OneSource functions as a 24/7/365 gateway to trusted information, comprehensive resources, and direct support covering every aspect of military life. It’s available at no cost to eligible users anywhere in the world, serving as a virtual extension of installation-based services.
The program operates on the principle that families under stress shouldn’t navigate complex bureaucracies of different programs and acronyms. A user can call with a problem like “I’m overwhelmed by our upcoming move” without knowing the formal program name. Military OneSource consultants then provide warm handoffs to appropriate resources while navigating the system on the user’s behalf.
Who Can Use Military OneSource
Eligibility is intentionally broad to cover the Total Force and extended family networks:
- Active-duty service members from all branches and their immediate families
- National Guard and reserve members regardless of activation status, plus their families
- Veterans and retirees, plus immediate family members, for up to 365 days after separation
- Survivors, including non-remarried spouses and children of deceased service members
- Wounded warriors and designated caregivers enrolled in seriously ill or injured programs
- Military academy cadets, designated DoD expeditionary civilians, and parents or extended family seeking assistance for service members
Core Services
Confidential Non-Medical Counseling provides free, short-term counseling for individuals, couples, and families. Services are available face-to-face in local communities, over the phone, via secure online chat, or through video sessions. Counselors help with stress management, relationship issues, deployment adjustments, and grief.
Financial and Tax Counseling includes access to accredited financial counselors providing budgeting, debt management, savings, and investment strategy support. The MilTax program offers free, specialized tax preparation and e-filing software designed for military families, plus consultations with tax experts.
Spouse Education and Career Opportunities (SECO) provides comprehensive career coaching, education resources, and information on financial aid like the My Career Advancement Account (MyCAA) Scholarship, offering up to $4,000 for licenses, certifications, or associate degrees. The portal connects spouses with the Military Spouse Employment Partnership (MSEP), a network of hundreds of employers committed to hiring military spouses.
Relocation and Deployment Support includes interactive tools like “Plan My Move” and “Plan My Deployment,” providing customized checklists, calendars, and essential information for managing these major life transitions.
Specialty Consultations offer one-on-one expert guidance on complex issues including Special Needs support through the Exceptional Family Member Program, New Parent guidance covering everything from sleep challenges to single parenthood navigation, Elder Care resources for families caring for aging parents, and Adoption consultation and resources.
Digital Resilience Tools include free mobile apps and online programs for on-the-go support. CoachHub connects users with live health and wellness coaches for personalized goal setting. MoodHacker provides evidence-based mood tracking and improvement tools. Love Every Day strengthens relationships for couples. Chill Drills offers guided audio exercises for mindfulness and stress reduction.
How to Connect
Military OneSource is designed for easy, 24/7 access from anywhere in the world:
Phone: 800-342-9647 Website: militaryonesource.mil Live Chat: Available 24/7 directly from the website for immediate, confidential assistance
The strategic design places Military OneSource as the “operating system” for DoD support. Nearly every other major program directs users to Military OneSource as a primary or alternative contact point. This dramatically simplifies access to care and reduces the mental burden of seeking help.
Specialized Counseling Programs
While Military OneSource serves as the comprehensive front door, the DoD also offers specialized programs providing deeper, focused support for specific life situations.
Military and Family Life Counseling (MFLC)
The MFLC program provides free, short-term, non-medical counseling to service members, spouses, children, and survivors. The program employs master’s or doctorate-level licensed counselors specifically trained to work with military communities and their unique challenges.
What MFLCs Address: The program covers deployment stress, reintegration challenges, relationship problems, stress and anger management, parenting skills, and grief and loss. MFLCs don’t provide long-term care, formal mental health diagnoses, or fitness-for-duty evaluations—for these needs, they facilitate warm handoffs to military treatment facilities or appropriate resources.
Confidentiality Protection: A key feature is strict confidentiality. Services aren’t reported to commands, and seeking help doesn’t impact security clearances. This removes fear of career repercussions. The only exceptions are those required by law for safety—duty to warn, suspected domestic violence or child abuse, and illegal activity.
Proven Effectiveness: A RAND Corporation study found the MFLC program highly effective, with over 80% of participants reporting reduced stress and anxiety. Furthermore, over 96% of users were satisfied with the program’s confidentiality and speed of connection to counselors.
How to Access MFLCs: Counselors are often “embedded” in places where military families live and work—within specific units, at installation Military and Family Support Centers, in DoD schools, and at Child Development Centers. Many installations publish contact lists for unit-specific MFLCs.
For children, Child and Youth Behavioral MFLCs specialize in issues affecting military children like bullying, dealing with parental deployment, and coping with divorce. They’re typically located in schools and youth centers. Written parental consent is required for children under 18.
The easiest access is calling Military OneSource at 800-342-9647 or contacting local Military and Family Support Centers. Military leaders can also request MFLC support for units to provide briefings or group counseling after difficult events.
Exceptional Family Member Program (EFMP)
EFMP is a mandatory enrollment program for active-duty service members with family members—spouses, children, or dependent adults—who have diagnosed physical, emotional, developmental, or intellectual conditions requiring specialized medical or educational services.
The Program’s Purpose: EFMP ensures families’ documented special needs are considered during military assignment processes. This prevents families from being sent to duty stations, particularly overseas, that lack necessary medical specialists, therapies, or educational infrastructure to support their family members.
Three Program Components:
Identification & Enrollment (EFMP-M) is the medical component that screens family members, documents specific needs, and officially enrolls them. This results in a “Q-code” placed on service members’ personnel records, flagging them for special consideration during assignments.
Assignment Coordination (EFMP-A) is the personnel component working with service branches’ assignment managers. It balances service members’ career progression with families’ documented needs, finding assignments at locations where required services are available.
Family Support (EFMP-FS) provides hands-on support, typically located at installation Military and Family Support Centers. EFMP Family Support staff serve as navigators and advocates, providing information, referrals, and direct assistance.
Key Family Support Services include system navigation and advocacy to connect families with on- and off-base resources, educational support with special education system navigation including help with Individualized Education Programs and 504 Plans, relocation assistance ensuring smooth transitions of medical care and educational services during PCS moves, respite care providing temporary relief for primary caregivers (up to 25 hours monthly for eligible Army families), and support groups and events connecting EFMP families with each other.
How to Access: Enrollment is mandatory and initiated by service members. The process typically starts at installation EFMP Medical offices within military treatment facilities or through online portals like the Army’s E-EFMP system. For ongoing assistance, families connect with EFMP Family Support offices at local Military and Family Support Centers.
EFMP & Me is a powerful online tool providing families with personalized checklists, tools, and resources for managing every journey stage from enrollment to PCS moves and educational needs changes.
Branch-Specific Support Programs
While the Department of Defense provides overarching guidance and central resources, each military branch has developed its own support ecosystem tailored to unique cultures, operational tempos, and service languages.
| Branch | Primary Program/Center | Primary Website |
|---|---|---|
| U.S. Army | Army Community Service (ACS) / Ready and Resilient (R2) | armyresilience.army.mil |
| U.S. Air Force & Space Force | Military & Family Readiness Center (M&FRC) / Comprehensive Airman Fitness (CAF) | resilience.af.mil |
| U.S. Navy | Fleet and Family Support Center (FFSC) | ffr.cnic.navy.mil |
| U.S. Marine Corps | Marine Corps Community Services (MCCS) | usmc-mccs.org |
| U.S. Coast Guard | CG SUPRT Program | cgsuprt.com |
U.S. Army: Ready and Resilient (R2)
The R2 program is the Army’s core strategy for strengthening individual and unit personal readiness. It fosters a culture of trust and reinforces Army Values by educating Soldiers, DA Civilians, and families on building connections and taking care of one another.
Five Dimensions of Personal Readiness: The R2 framework builds upon Physical, Emotional, Social, Spiritual, and Family strength dimensions.
Master Resilience Training: A foundational “train-the-trainer” model selects Soldiers for intensive courses to become certified Master Resilience Trainers. These MRTs serve as resilience subject matter experts for commanders, teaching critical skills like goal setting, energy management, de-catastrophizing, and effective communication throughout units. Participant testimonials describe the training as “life changing” and the “best training I have ever received in my 20-year military career.”
R2 Performance Centers: Physical centers located on Army installations worldwide provide customized performance and resilience training for Soldiers, family members, and DA Civilians.
Training can be requested by contacting the nearest R2 Performance Center or submitting the R2 Training Request Form found on the Army Resilience Directorate website.
U.S. Air Force & Space Force: Comprehensive Airman Fitness (CAF)
CAF is described as a “lifestyle and culture” taking a holistic approach to building a thriving and resilient Air and Space Force community. The term “Airman” collectively refers to all military members, civilians, and their families.
Four Pillars: The CAF framework structures around Mental, Physical, Social, and Spiritual fitness domains.
Integrated Resilience Office: This office and its Integrated Primary Prevention Workforce spearhead prevention efforts for harmful behaviors by addressing their shared risk and protective factors.
Master Resilience Trainers and Resilience Training Assistants: Similar to the Army model, MRTs act as “force multipliers,” trained to teach resilience skills like mindfulness, gratitude, and goal setting in various settings from First Term Airman Centers to Professional Military Education courses and spouse orientations.
The primary local access point for family services is the installation’s Military and Family Readiness Center. The Air Force Resilience website serves as a central hub for crisis support, resources, and CAF information.
U.S. Navy: Fleet and Family Support Centers (FFSC)
FFSCs are the Navy’s one-stop-shop, providing programs and services designed to promote self-reliance, resilience, and overall family readiness to support the Navy mission.
FFSCs offer wide arrays of free services including clinical counseling, deployment support, relocation assistance, personal financial management, transition and employment assistance, and EFMP support.
Sailors and families can visit local FFSCs, with directories available online. For many services, including clinical counseling, the Navy uses a Centralized Scheduling system at 1-866-923-6478. Virtual “face-to-face” counseling via video conferencing is also available.
U.S. Marine Corps: Marine Corps Community Services (MCCS)
MCCS is a comprehensive system supporting operational readiness and quality of life for Marines and their families. Its goal is to “remove points of friction” from military life and help Marines “adapt, thrive, and win life’s battles.”
The MCCS ecosystem covers nearly every aspect of life on Marine Corps installations, including behavioral health services (counseling, substance abuse programs), personal and professional development (financial management, transition assistance), family readiness programs (deployment support, EFMP), and morale, welfare, and recreation activities like fitness centers, dining, and shopping at Marine Corps Exchanges.
MCCS services are located on Marine Corps installations globally. Access is highly localized, so users should consult installation-specific MCCS websites for detailed directories of phone numbers for programs like Community Counseling Programs or Family Readiness Offices.
U.S. Coast Guard: CG SUPRT Program
CG SUPRT is a 24/7, professionally staffed service designed to assist all members of “Team Coast Guard” and their families with wide ranges of mental health and life concerns, from work stress to relationship issues.
To ensure confidentiality, the program is delivered by an outside contractor. Services include up to 12 free confidential counseling sessions per issue per year, financial and legal services, health coaching, spouse career counseling, and referrals for needs like child care and elder care.
Access: Phone: 855-CG-SUPRT (855-247-8778); Website: cgsuprt.com; Mobile App: A dedicated CG SUPRT mobile app is available.
CG SUPRT eligibility includes active duty, selected reservists, full-time civilian employees, and full-time MWR/Exchange employees, along with their dependents.
Support for Major Life Events
Understanding available programs is the first step; applying them to specific, high-stress events that define military life is the next. This practical guide helps families facing deployments, PCS moves, or challenges with finances and child care.
Deployment Cycle Support
Deployments involve prolonged family separation, disrupting routines and placing immense stress on both deployed service members and families on the homefront.
Pre-Deployment: Focus is on preparation, including creating formal Family Care Plans, ensuring legal documents like wills and powers of attorney are current, and using resources like Military OneSource’s Plan My Deployment tool for checklists and task organization.
During Deployment: Support shifts to coping and connection. Resources include free, confidential counseling to manage stress, peer support programs connecting spouses with others who understand, and tools helping children navigate separation, such as Sesame Street for Military Families.
Reintegration: Assistance is available for navigating reunion and reintegration phases, which can be challenging adjustments for entire families establishing “new normals.” Military and Family Support Centers offer workshops and counseling to facilitate this process.
Local Military and Family Support Centers are primary in-person resources, while Military OneSource provides 24/7 virtual support and service connections.
PCS Move Assistance
PCS moves are significant logistical, financial, and emotional undertakings, consistently cited as top stressors for military families. The Relocation Assistance Program eases these burdens through information, counseling, and financial support.
Financial Support Allowances:
| Allowance Name | Purpose | Eligibility/Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Dislocation Allowance (DLA) | Partially reimburses miscellaneous moving expenses not otherwise covered | CONUS & OCONUS. Flat-rate payment based on rank and dependency status |
| Temporary Lodging Expense (TLE) | Partially reimburses lodging and meal costs in temporary housing at old or new CONUS location | CONUS only. Limited to set number of days |
| Temporary Lodging Allowance (TLA) | Partially reimburses higher-than-normal living expenses in temporary overseas housing | OCONUS only. Authorized when permanent housing not yet available |
| Move-In Housing Allowance (MIHA) | Reimburses overseas costs of making private housing habitable | OCONUS only. Covers fixed, one-time, non-refundable costs |
| Per Diem Allowance | Provides set allowance for lodging, meals, and incidental costs during official travel days | CONUS & OCONUS. Rates set by location |
| Monetary Allowance in Lieu of Transportation (MALT) | Mileage reimbursement for driving Privately Owned Vehicles between duty stations | CONUS & OCONUS. Based on official distance |
Logistical Support:
MilitaryINSTALLATIONS is the official DoD website for researching new duty stations with detailed information on housing, schools, child care, and local services.
The Defense Personal Property System (DPS) is the online portal for scheduling household goods shipments with transportation companies, tracking status, and filing claims for loss or damage.
Plan My Move provides comprehensive checklists and resources guiding families through every move stage.
Installation Military and Family Support Centers are primary contact points for relocation briefings, workshops, and one-on-one assistance.
Financial Readiness and Spouse Employment
Financial instability and spouse unemployment are critical, interconnected issues directly threatening family well-being and the military’s ability to retain experienced personnel.
Personal Financial Management: Service members and spouses have free access to Personal Financial Managers and Personal Financial Counselors through installation support centers and Military OneSource. These accredited professionals provide confidential counseling and education covering spending plans, debt reduction, and military retirement system understanding.
MilSpouse Money Mission: This financial education website created specifically for military spouses offers blogs, calculators, quizzes, and resources tailored to military life events at milspousemoneymission.org.
Spouse Employment Support: The Spouse Education and Career Opportunities program, accessible through Military OneSource, provides comprehensive career coaching, the MyCAA Scholarship offering up to $4,000 for portable career credentials, and access to the Military Spouse Employment Partnership—a network of over 600 companies committed to hiring military spouses.
New Initiatives: The Military Spouse Career Accelerator Pilot is a paid fellowship program placing spouses with companies. The 4+1 Commitment encourages employers to adopt spouse-friendly policies like remote work and job transferability.
Child Care and Parenting Support
The shortage of affordable, high-quality child care is a major family stressor and consistently cited as a primary barrier to military spouse employment.
DoD Child Care System: On-installation Child Development Centers provide full-day care, while certified Family Child Care homes offer care in home-based settings. Fees are set on sliding scales based on total family income. The official DoD portal to search for and request care worldwide is militarychildcare.com.
Fee Assistance Programs: For families who cannot access on-base care due to waitlists or distance, programs like Military Child Care in Your Neighborhood provide fee assistance to help offset accredited civilian child care costs in local communities. This program is managed by Child Care Aware® of America.
New Initiatives (2024-2025): The Child Care Expansion Initiative partners with non-profits to build new centers in high-demand areas. MCCYN-PLUS broadens eligible off-base provider pools using state quality ratings. A pilot program for in-home child care fee assistance is being tested in locations with the longest waitlists.
Parenting Support: The New Parent Support Program offers voluntary home visits, parenting classes, and playgroups for expectant parents and families with children up to age three. Thrive, a free online DoD program, provides evidence-based positive parenting tips for children of all ages.
Crisis Support and Emergency Resources
While many programs focus on building long-term resilience, immediate, easily accessible information is critical for those in crisis. These resources are available 24/7:
| Service Name | Phone Number | Text/Online Chat | Website |
|---|---|---|---|
| Military & Veterans Crisis Line | 988, then press 1 | Text 838255 or Chat Online | veteranscrisisline.net |
| DoD Safe Helpline (Sexual Assault) | 877-995-5247 | Chat Online | safehelpline.org |
| National Domestic Violence Hotline | 800-799-SAFE (7233) | Chat Online | thehotline.org |
| National Suicide Prevention Lifeline | 988 | Chat Online | 988lifeline.org |
| Military OneSource | 800-342-9647 | Chat Online | militaryonesource.mil |
These resources represent the culmination of decades of learning about military family needs. They exist because the military community recognized that extraordinary service requires extraordinary support. The programs aren’t perfect—implementation varies, waitlists exist, and bureaucracy sometimes interferes. But they represent a comprehensive attempt to address the unique challenges of military life.
For military families, understanding these resources isn’t just about knowing where to turn during emergencies. It’s about recognizing that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. The military has invested billions in these programs because strong families create strong service members, and strong service members ensure national security.
The key is knowing these resources exist and feeling empowered to use them. Whether facing a crisis or simply needing guidance on everyday military life challenges, help is available. The only requirement is reaching out.
Our articles make government information more accessible. Please consult a qualified professional for financial, legal, or health advice specific to your circumstances.
